The Deathbed Conversion Trap: Why You Shouldn't "Change the Bus Halfway"

The Flashback: A Shadow in a Western Suit

Back in June 2008, I published a post on this journal that still generates conversations today. It started with a frantic message from a client named Jack, who was seeing moving shadows in his home.

Months earlier, during a routine Feng Shui audit, I had felt a heavy, unmoving presence in his late father’s bedroom. When I later entered meditative stabilization to see what was happening, I encountered a spirit on the staircase wearing a sharp Western suit. When I asked why he was still there, his answer was heartbreakingly simple:

*"This is my home. Nobody invited me to the ancestral tablet."*

When I called Jack the next day to ask if his father had been buried in a Western suit—a rare choice for traditional Chinese families in Malaysia at the time—Jack was stunned. It was true. We resolved the issue by properly inviting his father to the ancestral tablet, and the shadows vanished.

2. The Core Problem: Subconscious Ties at the Exit Door

The reason Jack’s father was stuck on the physical plane wasn't malice; it was confusion. Throughout his life, his subconscious mind was deeply mapped to Taoist traditions. But in his final days, facing a terminal illness, his family pressured him to switch religions.

When you change a person’s spiritual alignment right at the exit door, they have no deep, lifelong subconscious roots in that new faith. When they pass, they become disoriented. They don't belong to the new path yet, and they've been cut off from the old one. They are stuck between stations.

As I wrote back then: **We must love our family enough to let them choose their own vehicle for the final journey.**

3. The 2026 Growth Ring: What 18 Years of Practice Has Taught Me

Looking back at that 2008 post, I realize I treated it as a spiritual mechanics problem—perform the ritual, move the spirit, fix the haunting.

Nearly two decades later, I look at that case with much more empathy for the family, but an even firmer stance on spiritual sovereignty. In the years since, I have seen this exact scenario play out dozens of times. Well-meaning children, driven by the fear of their parents "going to the wrong place," force a deathbed conversion.

What they don't see is the spiritual friction it causes.

In 2026, we talk a lot about living our truth and having autonomy over our lives. But we rarely talk about autonomy over our deaths. True spiritual maturity means respecting a person's lifelong internal compass, even if it doesn't match your own. You cannot force a soul into a mold it hasn't spent a lifetime building.

4. Where the Energy Sits Today

If you are caring for an aging or ill loved one, the temptation to "save" them through your own spiritual lens is powerful. But the greatest act of filial piety or love you can offer is space—the space to let their subconscious mind rely on the symbols, prayers, and traditions that comforted them when they were strong.

Don't force them to change buses halfway across the bridge. Let them cross in the vehicle they know.

Spiritual Clothing

Those that come to Kam Dong San temple, where I volunteer sometime will wonder how come this fella only wear bermuda and round neck T. Yes I'm too casual even for a Taoist. 

Official Clothing and official adornments are necessary for official functions as a cultural identification, nothing more nothing less.

When I'm in a Vajrayana function especially those presiding with Rinpoche's that I know personally, I would cover up with my Ngakpa shawl to show my respect for the Rinpoche. Normal teachings by other Rinpoche or Lama I prefer to wear normal like everyone else.

 

Taoist event or Celebrations, I just wear whatever is comfortable. Why? The deities should be able to recognize me even if I'm naked! If a Taoist is properly initiated, spiritually he would have a Taoist robe. Every being in the spiritual world would be able to see it. The robe will stay with you as long as you do not break any precepts set forth by the deities.

If you practice consistently and purely, instead of robe there will be glow and bright aura on your body. Spiritual beings, Deities, Bodhisattvas will instantly recognize you as a pure cultivator regardless of what you wear or don't wear.

What do you wear in your dreams? Whatever your mind can come up with. What you wear spiritually? The purity of your cultivation.

Tao Fa Path With Kam Dong San Temple

Finally the new revision of Tao Fa Path with Kam Dong San Temple is up. It provides a bearing and direction for existing and new people who are interested in Tao Fa path.

Here are the Rules and Regulation for Kam Dong San Temple Disciples

Conditions for Initiations

1. Male and Female must be 25 years of age and above and married. If not married at least must be 40 years of age.

2. Must be temple member for at least 1 year with 80% attendance on deities celebration then only will be considered for initiation.

3. All disciples must use the oracle by Master to seek for approval disciple before initiation.

4. After initiation, person will need to attend at least 8 times Fish Liberation in year (out of state disciples can choose to donate for liberation activities)

5. Person will need to learn basic Smoke Offering.

Rules & Precepts for Disciples

1. Tao Fa cannot be use to earn a living.

2. No extra marital affairs for married disciple. If single, cannot be romantically involved with any individuals who are married.

3. Not allowed to be involved in illegal activities under the law.

4. Cannot use Tao Fa to help those who are involved with illegal activities

5. Every 1st and 15th Lunar month must be on vegetarian diet.

Most important is to have a sense of righteousness and a faithful heart. Link for Kam Dong San Temple http://www.facebook.com/kdspg

Feng Shui Setup or Spiritual Help which is the Priority?

Received a call from a long time client about 3 weeks ago. He told me that he is now experiencing hard times. He have just moved the 4th times to an office. His first and 2nd office was audited by me. Currently his business also cannot make enough to pay for his staff salary. He has no where to turn to except trying his luck to ask for my help.

When I audited his business office, he made decent profit and business was growing. That was the condition he was in when I last met him. He did not engage me on his 3rd time moving, and to me that was normal because maybe he finds that luck was on his side and my services was not needed anymore.

I have decided to helped him out due to his past standing as good client. He told me he cannot afford to pay my fees however he will be willing to pay me once he is stable again.
Cleared my appointment on the nearest availability and decided to audit his place as fast as possible.

When I arrived on to audit his current office, the first thing I noticed was there was quite a number of Taoist spiritual implements inside his office. I checked the site with my Loupan and discovered that the front door location and direction is actually not bad for his type of business.

However once inside, all the Feng Shui setup was wrong. From his sitting location, his staff sitting location, enhancing the qi for the type of business plus even the water exits within is all not conducive for his business.

No wonder he is in such a mess.  His personal space within the office has a lot of Taoist spiritual implements from sword to flags to even ancient chinese coins below the desk and a whole lot more.

I advised him to relocate those spiritual items, consolidate some of it while others that cannot be use to be place in storage. He looked at me with a puzzling look. I am not surprised, because in all those years of him knowing me and conducted 2 audits for his office, never once did I mentioned to him about using spiritual implements nor about my Taoist background.

Seeing his puzzling look, I knew if I did not elaborate on my Taoist background he was not going to remove those items. I continue to explained to him that one of the talisman which he painstakingly went to a South Thailand Taoist Temple to obtain is actually one of my Taoist lineage. I further briefly informed him on 2 more Taoist lineage that I am holding, and the reason spiritually why he should relocate those items and consolidate them.

I always believe, if a Feng Shui Master is good at what he is doing, he does not need to use other fields of knowledge to solve the Feng Shui problem. Example, adding spiritual context into solving a Feng Shui problem. On the other hand, if a Taoist Master is good at what he is doing, he does not need to add Feng Shui into solving spiritual matters. Using spiritual method alone will be able to solve the spiritual problems.

Furthermore, I do not like to confuse my client on who are they actually hiring, The Feng Shui Master or the Taoist Master? If in doubt, usually I assure them that you are hiring a practical logical Feng Shui Master who have strong Taoist religious belief. This rarely happen because 90% of my client knows me as a Feng Shui master or practitioner only.

After advicing on the recommendations, finally I gave him some talisman to solve his existing pressing business problem. Because to wait for the Feng Shui setup to run its course requires at least 10 days in which the time he does not have at the moment. Told him the spiritual help is pro-bono but make sure he pays my Feng Shui due fees when he is ok again.

Moral of the story -
1. Remember your Feng Shui Master when you are having a good run.
2. Spiritual methods will work once your environment setup is done correctly. Or else the spiritual help will be like trying to push a heavy cart uphill, you cannot continuously use spiritual method to solve a basic Feng Shui environmental mistake.
3. Remember your Feng Shui Master when you are having a good run. (its not a typo repeat)

Using Wooden Oracle - 2 Days Before Spring 2016

2 days before spring 立春，my wife told me that the coffee shop lady (Aunty) at our temple building seems kind of troubled lately. She described to me that she seems to having greyish tone to her face and also she lost about 5kg in 1 week.

The aunty asked my wife whether she can come and consult our temple on spiritual matters as she is worried that she has either exposed or bump into some spiritual entities. My wife relay to her that Kam Dong San temple did not have spiritual consultation anymore as it is already so close to Chinese New Year. When I heard about it, I ask my wife to inform aunty to come up to the temple and consult using the wooden oracle.

Using the wooden oracle in the temple could sometime be more accurate than enquiring through medium because it totally eliminate the emotional, value and belief systems of the medium. Therefore the answer is always without prejudice.

The aunty have also gone to the local General Hospital for check up, because she was worried that it was something medical. After whole body check up, with exception to her kidneys (as she was supposed to be back in the hospital between that few days to complete it) . All results showed that she is normal. 

However she does not have appetite and can barely sleep at night due to restlessness for unknown reason. She has also relay to my wife that her brother have enquired about her condition at another temple that has a medium. According to that medium, she has no spiritual problem.

On the day before Spring, I was on my way to the temple to consecrate the new Jade Emperor statue. Aunty is schedule to come up to our temple after the consecration to enquire the Deities on her problem. While driving, I went into meditative stabilisation and enquire about aunty's condition. Some of you reading this will be wondering, how to get into meditative stabilisation while driving? If the enquiry is not too complex, usually with experience one can do it. Its just like humming a tune while driving. 

Anyhow, I know for sure aunty has bump into some spiritual entity and I was advised by the deities to give aunty some clearing talisman after her enquiry at the temple.

Aunty came up to our temple and do the usual offering of joss sticks, and I have advised her on how to inform and request the deities for help. After she has inform on all her particulars and also her questions, I then told her to use the wooden oracle.

Wooden Oracle  (POSITIVE) @ Puak Puay in Hokkien Dialect

If the Deities answered her oracle in 3 positive throw (consecutively) - 1 wooden oracle must face up and the other face down which is called 圣杯 Sheng Bei, then it would be confirmed that she has spiritual problem. If anything else 2 oracle face up or down, then it would not be a confirmation.

She did 3 throws consecutively and it was all positive to confirmed on her condition. I asked her to throw another one after her 3 confirmation to asked whether 'other than spiritual problem, does she have a medical problem to add on to it' and the throw came back negative.

Once it was confirmed as to my enquiry during meditative stabilisation, I later passed aunty 5 talisman for her to ingest and 1 for her to wash. On the day of Spring, my wife met aunty again at the coffee shop and she was glad to say that she felt much better after ingesting the first talisman and felt like a big weight was lifted off her chest from the past week.

Today on the 4th day of Chinese New Year, her coffee shop was open and she told my wife, she felt great and have a very good appetite during Chinese New Year.

The Trick to Money is Having Some - Part 2 (Final)

This is the 2^nd part of the Trick To Money is Having Some. For part 2, I am going to emphasise on how to seek spiritual help in obtaining wealth. This will only work, if you are completely immerse with my part 1 posting http://yinyangjournal.blogspot.com/2014/10/the-trick-to-money-is-having-some-part-1.html

Taoist Method.

1. Earth God at Home/Office 地神
   Earth God in Taoist system of belief represents, the local earth deities. Slightly higher than spirits, they are bound to the area, place or home. Every home/area or office has its own assigned local earth deities. If you already have a Earth God in your home/office, the practice is to regularly do proper offering.
   Proper means regular offering of tea and water. 1^st and 15^th day of the Lunar Month, make more elaborate offering of fruits. You can also regularly make gold paper offering. Common offerings of biscuits, sweets and chocolates are also encouraged.
   Some homes that I have visited, they have Earth God setup, but no water offering, no tea offering. The urns are messy, cobwebs around. They only thing they do is just offer incense when ever they are free. This is a sure way to get problems from Earth bound deities. Because unlike higher Deities, they still have a lot attachments.

Earth Deities of Kam Dong San Temple (www.facebook.com/kdspg)

1. God of Wealth 財神
   
   Some will have consecrated God of Wealth in their home/office, in this case we are mentioning 趙公明元帥. You can also visit temple that have this Deity. The best time is during his celebration which is on 5^th day of the 1^st Lunar Month. Bring offerings such as fruits, biscuits, chocolates, juices etc. Remember don't be stingy, if you have read part 1 posting then you will know what is the mind set to have. Request for blessings and also for good ideas! Why good ideas? 1 idea can make you millions.
   
   Don't request for 4D or lottery, that is hard to come by, because it will need a strong luck on your side to fulfilled it.

Vajrayana Method.

In Buddhism the basic core idea of wealth, is the ability to detach from it. Not get more of attachment! However as mentioned in part 1, when your motivation is different, then wealth is still greed, but greed with a higher purpose, which is to help others. If your sole motivation to practice any wealth method in Vajrayana for your own selfish ego, no matter how dedicated you are, it won't have any results.

1. Sang Offering/Smoke Offering
   
   Sang offering is a practice where the practitioner gathers dry food such as grains, sugars, rice, medicine, incense and blend it into powder form. Then the powder is burn and the smoke aroma becomes an offering to all higher deities and karmic debtors. This particular offering is especially helpful in clearing obstacles in your life. As manifestation of obstacles are usually your karmic debtors who are in the way of what ever that you may try to accomplish. Some Sang offering practice requires empowerment from a Lama or Rinpoche while some does not require empowerment.
2. Jambhala Practice
   
   Whenever there is a Rinpoche in town offering Jambhala Initiation, whether it is White, Yellow, Black,Green or Red Jambhala you will see throngs of people lining up. Many have the mistaken notion that once you get the initiation, wealth will be upon you.
   
   To practice any Jambhalas, first few requirements are highlighted in part 1. Without the correct mindset, no result can be obtain from your practice. However if you are practicing for the well beings of others, Jambhala practice will be very swift.

General Method.

1. Do donation. Donation? you may ask, you may also be saying that you don't have any to give. The reason you are reading this posting is how to get money, not give it away. Because you are not clear of the rules, which is why you have problems getting it. Give or donate to a charity that can benefit lots of people immediately. Why immediately, because the idea is to gather worldly merits that can help in your financial prosperity. Keep in mind however that it is a lower motivaton to donate and expect something in return from the universe. The highest motivation would be donate without any notion of expectation. Until you reach there, this is the way to start.
   
   
   
2. Practice Liberation. Liberation of animals especially fishes, helps you to gather merits or worldly merits fast. This is because through life liberation, essentially you are helping the animals/fishes to extend their life without fear. This type of merits would help your tremendously if you have a lot of karmic debtors.

If you are totally down and out, without anything to give, then give your time and your attention to a charity organization. There is always something you can contribute, for you to slowly gather some forms of merits. When you have more then you can start to practice on the methods that I have recommended here. The idea is to start, or else you can never go to where you want by standing still.

Don't Change the Bus Half Way !

This incident happened about 2 months ago. One evening Jack and Penny (not their real name) decided to visit us, as Penny told my wife that Jack have something that he needs to tell me. Jack had been seeing shadows moving in his house for the past few days on that week itself. And he was asking me “Do you think it is my dad?”

How it all started is that when I was auditing their house about 6 months back, I noticed that the room his dad use to sleep was filled with a presence. The air is not moving even though the windows are open. So when I had a chance to meet up with Penny about a few months later, I have asked her to go to any temple that does bardo deliverance and submit Jack’s father name to it. Because I have a feeling that the father is still in the house.

Of course I did not mention to them that there is a spirit in the house when I did their Feng Shui audit, because Feng Shui and spiritual work does not mix or the client would be confused. After the bardo deliverance was completed, Jack was having this conversation with me about seeing shadows. So I promised him I would check it out for him. In my meditative stabilization, I saw a man wearing a western suit coming down from staircase in his home. I ask him “Why are you here?” and his reply was “This is my home”. I then ask why he does not go to the ancestral tablet area. He said “Nobody invited me.”

The next day, I gave Jack a call and ask him that when his father pass-away, did he wear a western suit. He thought for a while and confirmed it (not many Chinese in Malaysia wore a suit on their last day). I suggest to him 2 choices,


1. It is to do bardo deliverance again for the father, this time he has to attend to it personally.
2. To invite the father onto the ancestral tablet area.

Finally he decided for option 2. And after the ceremony, he no longer sees shadows moving in his house.

Why did we have this incident? It is because before his dad pass away, he use to pray to Taoist deities. But when he had a terminal illness, they decide to ask him to switch religion. That is the usual problem, because if all these while the person is associated with one religion, when they pass away, usually their subconscious will seek for the association with that religion for them to cross over.

If you change their religion nearing their exit time, they have no strong subconscious ties with the new religion that they have just embrace. Therefore they are stuck in physical plain unable to cross over.

Love your loved one dearly to allow them to choose their own religion. We have no right to choose it for them.